Should I Stay or Should I Go
Oh man what a bender I had last night. I don't remember all that much. I was at a bar and someone drank me under the table. I awoke later and was hungry and headed for the smells of hamburgers. The restaurant drove off after me paying. I awoke with water dripping on my face close to where I had eaten before.---
To solve the thing, you must become the M.
--- EDIT ---
At the bar at DreamHack one would find this note, and at the water hose in the eastern part of the D hall
next to the Burger truck was a note with the text "Mr Jock, TV quiz PhD, bags few lynx".
At the bar at DreamHack was a Huffman tree empty of values, and at the water hose in the eastern part of the D hall next to the Burger truck was a note with the perfect pangram "Mr Jock, TV quiz PhD, bags few lynx". Populating the tree with the phrase and solving for the 90 degree turn paths on the artifact, one gets the phrase batholith. The phrase "to solve the thing, you must become the M" indicated that one should make turns as if there were standing at the M and facing downwards in the tree.